Giving thanks for what we have can be more than a prayerful expression of gratitude. When used with appropriate self-treatment techniques, this can be transformative. And it can be a routine that helps us many times a day rather than only once a year.
Many self-improvement approaches to release negative emotions and habits end with the reduction of the problem symptoms. You might think that thanksgiving is appropriate at this point, and to many this is where they stop and celebrate.
It is possible, however, to build much further on the positives in your life. By stimulating the right and left side of your body, while reciting an individualized affirmation, you can program many more strengths and resources into your life for which you will be thankful.
Jessica was truly delighted to find her depression relieved when she used the self-treatment method called WHEE: Whole Health – Easily and Effectively. For years she had moped her way through each day, rather like Eyore (from Christopher Robin) – moaning about all the problems and burdens she was carrying and unable to deal with. Having three children in as many years had utterly drained her. Worse, she was left to carry the major portion of there are when her husband left her for another woman. She was enormously relieved when she released feelings of hurt, anger and betrayal surrounding her divorce, 11 years earlier. It was like a heavy physical burden had been lifted from her shoulders.
Several weeks after the transformative day when she achieved these releases, Jessica was back for further advice on what to do, now that she had more energy. She was frustrated because she still lacked confidence in herself and felt inhibited in talking to new people, worrying that they would see through what she felt was essentially a false new facade of confidence and cheerfulness.
Using WHEE, a potent self-healing method, Jessica was able to install the self-assurance and anticipations of positive receptiveness and responses from new people she would meet. Rather than holding images of criticisms and rejections, she was able to create an image of being welcomed and accepted by people – for her newfound cheerfulness, willingness to listen and be helpful, and many other positive qualities. She was also able to strengthen her willingness to take risks of being rejected, along with other residues of her long-term depression.
We may sometimes be hampered by persistent feelings of resentments, after releasing residual traumatic memories and feelings. Again, strengthening our positive awarenesses and feelings can be a help.
When his brother-in-law was killed in an auto accident, Tim was surprised to find himself deeply missing contact with his own brother, whom he had not seen nor spoken with in more than a decade. The two brothers had been very close in childhood but broke off relations after a bitter argument over an inheritance.
Tom came for therapy to sort out his lingering angers and hurt feelings towards his brother. Though he was surprised at how quickly he was able to release these with WHEE, he still harbored a lingering annoyance that he couldn’t quite identify and that refused to clear when he worked on it without being able to connect with its roots.
It was only when he came to a place of full forgiveness for his brother’s behaviors that Tim realized he needed also to forgive himself. Having cleared his self-blame, he came into a profound place of peace about his relationship with his brother that he had not felt since their falling out. Tim also realized that he had a tendency to focus on negative experiences far more than on positive ones in his life.
Each of these examples is representative of a host of similar cases in which focusing on positives within ourselves can markedly enhance our self-healing. And it does not end there.
The mind is a restless creature, wandering constantly hither and yon, seeking amusements and readily chewing on almost anything that catches its attention. Anxieties and fears actually call for its attention, and it may have difficulty spitting them out, even after they have been well masticated – because many such issues do not lend themselves to normal digestion. It may take an act of will to swallow them down or spit them out and be done with them.
Most of us are much less drawn to focus with such attention on the positives in our lives. By consciously choosing to do so and practicing looking at what is full and satisfying in our glass rather than at what is empty and missing, we can markedly enhance the quality of our lives.
And so, when we have reached a more positive place of being, after releasing negatives and installing positives to replace them, there is place to firm up the positives even further with thanksgiving. Celebrating our achievement in reaching a place of positivity is a first step. Enjoying, even reveling in the positive feelings firms up our abilities to enjoy and stay in the inner spaces and relationships that promote further positive feelings.
Jessica, practicing staying in a positive, self-confident frame of mind, found that people did respond to her with warm welcomes. She went on to be thankful for many more blessings that came into her life – small and large.
Tim, having made peace within himself, went on to make peace with his brother. He, too, was pleased to practice thankfulness – and to catch himself when some of his old habits of latching onto resentments raised its head again. I’m a wholistic psychiatric psychotherapist, with a passion for teaching self-healing, bodymind and personal spiritual awareness. I authored “Seven Minutes to Natural Pain Release, WHEE for Tapping Your Pains Away,” and many articles on wholistic healing. I am editor of the International Journal of Healing and Caring http://www.ijhc.org; and appear internationally on radio and TV.
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